The People’s Republic of Conformity

The first thing to annoy me about the Beijing Olympics is China’s evident cheating in girls’ gymnasitcs, where they’ve flouted the minimum age standard by making false passports for a couple of children. If Chinese gymnasts He Kexin and Jiang Yuyuan are 15 1/2 years old, I’ll buy them each a Cadillac. Seeing them in Hi-Def makes me doubt these little tykes are a day over 14, actually. But nobody can make any sort of official protest until the games are over and they’re safely out of the country, for fear of judging reprisals or worse.

One thing that’s not in doubt is China’s history of cheating by lying about the ages of their female gymnasts:

Yang Yun of China won individual and team bronze medals at the 2000 Sydney Olympics and later said in an interview on state-run television that she had been 14 at the time of those Games. A Hunan Province sports administration report also said later that she had been 14 when she competed in Sydney.

Bela Karolyi, who coached Retton of the United States and Nadia Comaneci of Romania to their Olympic gold-medal triumphs, said the problem of under-age gymnasts had been around for years. Age is an easy thing to alter in an authoritarian country, he said, because the government has such strict control of official paperwork.

It’s sad that the government of China abuses these poor children. And desperate, because they’re not fooling anybody.

These Olympics were supposed to be China’s bid to show itself to the world in a favorable light, but so far we have an all-robot opening ceremony, a murdered tourist, a bizarre recruitment program that pumps professional athletes into junk sports like air rifle, girls’ weight-lifting and synchronized diving, and blatant cheating in the marquee events. China comes of as a deranged lunatic, obsessed with winning and lacking in both grace and the capacity for self-analysis; a Bridezilla.

In short, China is looking at a public relations nightmare. But that might be good in the long run, if it prompts some serious self-analysis.

Joey Crawford Gets His Revenge

Basketball fans know what I’m talking about. The Spurs didn’t play very well, just well enough to win if things had gone as they should have. It was questionable of the NBA to assign a referee to a playoff game featuring a team he has demonstrated bias against (so much so that he was suspended for it), and he sure enough showed why in failing to call the last second foul that was apparent to everybody, including Lakers coach Phil Jackson. The NBA should retire Crawford permanently.

But seriously, the Spurs aren’t upset about the non-call. They know they didn’t deserve to win.

How Sweep It Is

It was a real joy to see the A’s sweep the Boston Red Sox in the Coliseum over the weekend. None of the games was close, so we didn’t have the pleasure of seeing the back end of the Sox bullpen, Okajima and River-Dancing Papelbon, but the Sox fans were out in force and ripe for heckling. They’re most sensitive about the their team’s home ballpark, which was taken from a Little League team under the doctrine of Eminent Domain, but after that commentary on Manny being Manny by dropping fly balls gets their goats.

The A’s played great all around baseball, outscoring the undergarments 17 to 6 over the three games, with a one-hit shutout by a pitcher who started his career in the Boston farm system as the highlight. We don’t see Boston at home again this year, alas. The sweep knocked them out of first place in the East, where the Billy Rays currently lead. Boston first baseman Kevin Youkilis is currently on a record errorless streak by a first baseman, but the magic was revealed. He dropped two throws in game three, but the scorer gave the errors to the fielders.

With Mike Sweeney at first base, the A’s a defintely a contender-quality team in this rebuilding year. It’s odd how that works, with three of the young players acquired in trades already starting and playing well. The A’s have an embarrassment of riches in young talent right now, and without the steroids the older players aren’t as valuable as they have been. This is a young guy season so far, and it’s still early.

Harden and Brown Crush the Sox

Game 2 of the budding major league season was quite an enjoyable affair, as the Mighty A’s sent the Bosnia Red Sox home in disgrace. Harden no-hit the pretenders through 3, and struck ‘em out at will. Emil Brown redeemed himself with a game-winning three-run homer and Crosby continued his hitting tear.

The A’s aren’t a bad team this year, but if I were a member of Bosnia Nation I’d be worried about the pitching. The Sox look a lot like some Yankee teams of recent memory, all bats and no curveballs.

Beckett’s injured, Schilling’s out for the season, Matsuzaka is still erratic, and Lester looks like a batting practice patsy. The middle of the Sox lineup is as strong as anyones, but it’s going to take a lot of runs to overcome the help Sox pitching will give opposing teams this year. The A’s aren’t a strong hitting team, but they scored 5 runs in each of the two games in the Tokyo Dome.

The Yankees are dealing with their pitching woes with a youth movement, and the Sox response is something like an injury movement. Not good, Boston Nation.

Tough loss on Opening Day

As odd as it may seem, the A’s opened their season in Tokyo last night, losing to the Bosnians 6-5 in 10. There were two new faces in the A’s lineup, Ryan Sweeney in center and Emil Brown in left, and one new old face, Keith Foulke in the bullpen.

The A’s lost this game the old-fashioned way, through a blown save by MLB blown saves over-achiever Huston Street in the ninth followed by some equally dismal Street pitching in the tenth. Jack Kust struck out every time he came to the plate and didn’t get hit, so there’s a lot of continuity with this squad from last year’s team.

Crosby, Ellis, Barton, and Hannahan all did well at the plate, so for now the infield isn’t holding the team back. With a little production from the over-stocked outfield, and some re-arranging of the deck chairs in the bullpen this could be a solid second-place team.

Opening Day Looms

Finally, our long national nightmare is about over. Next Tuesday at 3:00 AM Pacfic Time, the Mighty A’s take on some Eastern Division team in the Tokyo Dome. The DVR is fired-up and ready to go, and Mike has his Season Tickets ready for the home opener the following Saturday.

This is going to be a very different team that last year’s third place finisher, and in many ways a better one. Swish and Haren are gone, but there’s a whole crop of new faces in the outfield and the bullpen. Rumor has it that Crosby is healthy and setting up closer to the plate, and even China Doll Harden has thrown a few innings in Arizona without bankrupting Kaiser. The Evil Anaheim-Los Angeles-San Dimas Angels of Anaheim have their two top pitchers on the DL, and even Boson’s Beckett is ailing, so we ought to get off to a decent start.

The Western Division is going to be even stronger this year than it usually is, so I’m not going out on a limb to suggest the eventual World Series winner will come from the West. Unless it’s Detroit, a truly ferocious bunch of Kitties this season, of course. But dream teams have a way of not pulling through, due to all the pressure, I suppose.

My First Baseball Game

Thanks to Retrosheet, I can identify the first major league baseball game I ever saw in person, an epic 4-3 victory by the Yankees over the Senators on July 3, 1959. Winning pitcher Whitey Ford scored the winning run, Ryne Duren got the save, Mickey Mantle hit a single and Tony Kubek went 3-5 playing RF for some weird reason. I had remembered it as a 3-2 game, but was otherwise pretty accurate in my story-telling about it.

Cleveland Indians

Game 6 of the ALDS was painful to watch, with the Indians going limp all over the place. No pitching, no defense, no hitting. You can’t win too many games that way.

I’d like to see these boys get it together and win game 7, but it looks like they lack the killer instinct. Better to find about it now than in the World Series.

Excellent analysis

My post-season baseball predictions have been shockingly good. Each of the 3 game in the ALCS (AKA “Real World Series”) were won by the team I said had the pitching advantage. We’ll see if this holds up in game four, but I’m feeling pretty good about it on account of Wakefield coming off an injury and being a knuckler and all. Cleveland still has several key hitters MIA, such as Sizemore and Hafner, so those boys do need to step up.

The NLCS was a total snooze-fest, the only excitement coming in Game 4 when the Snakes had to leave their pitcher in to give up 6 runs in one inning because he was their best hitter. Dumping that poser Byrnes was the best thing Billy Beane ever did.

Rabid right-wing “Christian” fundamentalist Jeff Goldstein is pretty excited about the snake-handling Rockies playing the Champion, and I have to admit there’s something cute about a Cleveland-Rox series; as long as Ted Haggard doesn’t throw out the first pitch.